What mistakes haunt you in your sleep? Do memories of your past mistakes keep you up at night? Are you filled with shame and/or guilt from wrongs you’ve committed? Well first and foremost, I’m going to validate and normalize all of this…

We ALL make mistakes. Who are we to judge the graveness of our mistakes? Nevertheless, the mistakes that we make can really damage others as well as ourselves. Memories of these wrong doings can hurt like hell. The shame stings like lemon juice in an open wound. The guilt can strip us of much needed sleep, love, and happiness. And if you’re anything like me, the mistakes you made can lead you to a place of self-loathing, depression and isolation.

The title of this blog holds a special place in my heart, “Mistakes are our greatest teachers”. During my time of self-loathing, depression and isolation, God sent me many signs. He was calling out to me; trying to get me to see my way out of that dark and scary place. His one sign was on a white board that I passed every day at my place of work, “Mistakes are our greatest teachers”. It caught my attention my very first day at work. Since that moment, I have been on a journey of self-forgiveness.

Last night, I watched “Wild” starring Reese Witherspoon. She played the role of Cheryl Strayed. I highly recommend this movie to anyone. The underlying messages sprinkled throughout this film are life-changing. This film walks us through Cheryl Strayed’s self-forgiveness journey. Her self-forgiveness journey looked like a 1,100 mile trek through the Pacific Crest Trail solo. During her trek, she dared to dream…

“What if I forgave myself? I thought. What if I forgave myself even if I’ve done something I shouldn’t have? What if I was a liar and a cheat and there was no excuse for what I’d done other than because it was what I wanted and needed to do?” – Cheryl Strayed

I encourage you to ask those same questions to yourself. What if you forgave yourself? What’s the worst that could happen? You face your demons and overcome your self-hatred? Well, that sounds pretty awesome to me! But seriously, it’s not all rainbows and butterflies. Self-forgiveness is a tough journey. Just ask Cheryl Strayed. She trekked 1,100 miles to find self-forgiveness. Your journey is unique. It might not look like hiking the PCT. It might not look like mine. You can decide that for yourself.

Assess your mistakes. Own them. They are your responsibility. And then, learn from them. Cheryl Strayed needed to forgive herself for many things. Using heroin was one of them. Cheryl quotes, “What if heroin taught me something?”.

What if your mistakes taught you something? Mine sure did. I learned many things through my journey of self-forgiveness. I didn’t trek 1,100 miles across the PCT. But some days, it sure felt like it. Self-forgiveness is not easy. But nothing in life that is worth it comes easily. How will you use your mistakes as your greatest teachers?

One of my favorite motivational speakers, Brene Brown, sums it all up beautifully in this quote…

“Forgiveness is not forgetting or walking away from accountability or condoning a hurtful act; it’s the process of taking back and healing our lives so we can truly live.”

Check-out the Self-Affirmations Tab for more on self-forgiveness.